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  • friend:

    someone told me you look like an owl

  • me:

    who?

  • the whole class bursts into a roaring flame of laughter. tears start to fall from their eyes from laughing so hard. the principal walks in the room and slaps his knee. the local animals come in and create waves of laughter. god is laughing so hard he cant breathe. jesus starts clapping his hands and cracking up. the laughter dies down after about 2 hours, and everybody goes home with the memory of the funniest joke they've ever heard.

  • it should be "someone told me you **sound** like an owl"

  • loooooool but w.e still fuunny :

    P

You wonder why I’m insecure?

Because there are girls out there who look gorgeous without even trying. When they wake up they look like angels. when I wake up, I look like I just got out of a war. Those photogenic girls who look good in every photo. When someone takes a photo of me, my face looks half retarded. They don’t even need to dress nicely an they’ll still look good. How they can capture your attention just by walking past. I want to be able to do that.<3

(Source: anzpls)

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